THE DIVORCE

My uncle is a practicing attorney in Salt Lake City, and would handle our divorce for free. I contacted him and he filed the appropriated papers in court. It would take about 90 days before the petition could be heard by a judge, so Paula took the kids to her parent’s house in Montana.

Paula left me in May of 1986. In August of the same year, just three months after she left me, she called me up to tell me that she could not handle the kids, and that they would have a better life with me. She agreed to turn the children over to me and sign over custody.

I cannot, nor will I attempt to speculate, as to why she didn’t want to be the children’s mother at that time, but I knew it had something to do with her not being able to do the things that she wanted to. I believe she had a nervous breakdown, but this is only a speculation.

I had arranged with my father to have him go to Montana and get the kids and have Paula sign the custody papers. He went and met with Paula at her parent’s home.

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Alvin and Dora Mae Blade sat at their own table; and in the presence of my father, Michael J. Nemelka, my step-mother, Gloria, and my sister, Paulette, watched their daughter sign over custody of Brittany and Joshua to me. My father later told me that Paula’s parents protested and told her not to sign the papers. At that time, Paula wasn’t listening to anyone but Paula, so she did not hesitate to sign the papers. (See appendix A for the decree of divorce and the affidavit Paula signed, along with the affidavits from my mother, father, and uncle attesting to how the custody of the children was transferred.)

(Some spurious individuals in my family have spread the rumor that I made Paula sign the papers while she was in the hospital almost ready to die. How they came up with this ridiculous fable is a mystery to me. However, it will be revealed later how Paula herself lied about the transference of custody in order to win favor in the eyes of a judge.)

Our divorce was finalized on October 9, 1986. I was the legal custodial parent and Paula was awarded visitation.

From the time that Paula gave me custody of the children in August of 1986, to the time that I remarried in April of 1987, Paula saw the children only a few times. At one point I begged Paula to please come back to me so that the children wouldn’t suffer. I told Paula, “…that if I get married again, I will not allow you to interfere in the lives of the children, if you do not respect my right to raise the children how I want to raise them.” I let her know that if she caused problems with me and my new wife, I would move away and make it hard for her to see the children.

Paula called me on the day of my wedding to Jackie Stoll, April 7, 1987, and said, “This is the worst day of my life. Knowing that my children have another mother besides me, really hurts.”

Paula would visit the kids periodically, but every time she did, the children would come home confused and upset.

At this time, my journey to religious perfection was preceding at a good pace. Jackie was a wonderful woman who had the same desires to serve God as I did. We were a good match for religious fanaticism.

Everyone who I had trusted from the day I was born had let me down. I trusted no one. I became an independent thinker. I didn’t need the church, the government, family, friends, or the laws of society to tell me what to do. I began to convince myself that if God had something to tell me, he would tell me himself. With this attitude, I began to receive “revelation” from God.

I left Salt Lake City and went to Missouri, where I hoped to find other disillusioned Mormons searching for the “promised land”. (Joseph Smith, the Mormon founder, prophesied that Missouri would be where the Mormons would gather to await the second coming of Jesus.)

Before leaving for Missouri, I was served with an affidavit that outlined the complaints Paula had against me for not allowing her to exercise her visitation privileges. One will notice that the attorney who represented Paula had failed to serve me with an Order to Show Cause, which should legally accompany an affidavit, telling me when to show up in court. I had no idea that I was suppose to be in court, nor did I understand what was expected of me by way of allowing visitation to a woman, who I thought at the time, didn’t deserve to see the children she had abandoned.

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Needless to say, I left for Missouri before Paula’s attorney was able to serve me legally and properly. (See appendix B for the papers the attorney filed in court. Notice that I was supposedly served the Affidavit and Order to Show Cause on the 8th day of December 1987, but the order was not even filed in court until the 11th of December. I was only served the Affidavit on the 8th, and knew nothing about the order to appear in court. How was I supposed to show up at a court date I knew nothing about? I met with Paula’s original attorney in this matter in 1992, and she admitted that she had made the mistake.)

I formed a transient, self-employed company that would require me to continually move from place to place in search for work, thus making it difficult for Paula to establish formal visitation rights.

It wasn’t long before Paula stopped trying to track me down; and not having heard from her, I decided to settle my family down in one place.